yea, 

happiness comes uninvited

happiness goes unannounced.

i have been having these mixed and unknown feelings

no words can describe how i feel

happy? nervous? sad? guilty?

i don't know.

 it's Friday 

and i am unhappy without reason.

don't feel like talking.

i just want to shut my mouth up.

and block my ear 

so i wont hear what you have to say.

it happens all the time

every time when i am really looking forward to something.

thing might not end up as expected.

and now, i am scared.

similar thing will happen again, 

i knew, i always knew.

it's like a curse a spell.

i should be happy.

i brought a nice dress

except that i look fat in that dress.

and i get myself a charming prom date.

and i am not forced to found one

like what i did to my friends.

and i am going to the prom night tomorrow.

nothing will go wrong.

ya, i should be happy

but why, why i feel so moody :(((

i feel like all my happy hormones had been used up.

after Saturday,

everything will back to normal

back to my bored-no life-terrible life.

Life is so full of unpredictable beauty and strange surprises.

when something is just too beautiful

it's like a meteor shot across my sky

and suddenly everything was on fire

there was brilliancy

there was beauty

but when the meteor had fallen over the horizon

everything went black

nothing had changed

but my eyes were blinded by the light

i couldn't see the stars that used to appear on my dark night sky anymore.

cheerio, my friends